| Location | Brighton |
| Age | 0 |
| Cause of Death | Not Listed? |
| Date of Birth | 13/05/1994 |
| Date of Death | 13/05/1994 |
| Visitors | 2,694 since 06/02/2009 |
| Creator |
My beautiful baby girls...on this earth for so short a time...but in my heart forever.
I was told when I was 20 that I probably would never have children. My gynacologist recommended a hysterectomy for widespread endometriosis. I thought I'd hold out for a few years. But 8 years later I faced facts..I never would have kids and the pain from the endometriosos was too much..so off I went to have possible hysterectomy. When I woke up..the surgeon had reconstructed everything....I had a six month window...there was a chance I could have a baby. My partner and I decided to bring forward our plans of getting married and on our honey moon I began to feel quite unwell. When we got home I did a pregnancy test............YIPEE........I never ever thought this would happen. I had a scan....a little baby heart fluttering away. At 12 weeks another scan....TWO babies......can you imagine how happy I was , after years of denying I wanted children to save myself the heart ache of never having any...and here I was with 2 on the way. I felt sick from day one...but kept saying to myself that that was a good sign. At 20 weeks my belly was so big that i had to crawl up the stairs......at 23 weeks I saw the community midwife. I told her that I was concerned over how big I was and she said 'what do you expect...your having twins'..... a few days later and I was at antenatal clinic...well when they saw the size of me they were not happy...I was full term size at just under 24 weeks. I had polyhydramnios...an over production of amniotic fluid. the plan was to bring me in the next day and drain some fluid off. So I went home. Later that day I was just having a rest after eating cauliflower cheese (how is it I remember what I ate????) and something felt weird down below. I had a look and saw what is refered to as 'a show'. Called the hospital and they said come down now. On the way in the car my waters started leaking. When I got to the hospital the consultant checked me and told us I was in labour and there was nothing they could do. The paediatric team WOULD NOT even come and see me because i was a day short of 24 weeks. The day turned into the night and at 12.37am on the morning of Friday 13th May 1994, my first child Georgina May was born alive weighing 13ounces. There was a massive gush as the waters broke and she flew out..practically! I said..'it's georgina'...I will always remeber that,,,there was no doubt about her name.She was a perfect little thing..with the look of her Granny about her. She had the tiniest little voice and a soft soft head of fine hair that felt like velvet on my lips. As i cradled her in my arms I was so angry that no-one would even come and help her. I knew that I just had to hold her and wait till she died. Half an hour later at 01.03am and Lucy Elizabeth came into this world. But sadly as the waters broke when Georgina was born, the pressure tore the placenta away and so poor little Lucy was without oxygen and died inside me before she was born. Lucy looked just like her Daddy..with tiny chubby cheeks. I held them both and Georgina passed away at 01.52am. The sorrow that we felt was unexplainable.They were perfect. Nothing wrong with them at all. the reason they were born too soon.... I was too big.....my body let me down...well thats what i felt for many months...but I now hold firm to the fact that the community midwife is totally responsible for my daughters deaths. if she had not been so dimissive of my concerns..they could be here now. But they're not. They are in heaven and i know that one day I will hold them in my arms again.
Granny and Grampy came to see them the day they were born. The hospital chaplain came and blessed them. Later that day we went home and had to leave them behind. that was so hard to do....knowing they were down in the mortuary..all on their own. We went back a couple of days later and spent a couple of hours with them. Then two weeks after they were born we took them home. They spent the morning at home with us before we finally put them together in the little white coffin. At the funeral we had 'All things bright and beautiful' then as the curtain closed 'Brahms Lullaby'. That was so hard to walk away and leave them. But I knew they had to be cremated. If we buried them I would never be able to leave them. A children's garden of remembrance had been set up at the crem, so we had a plaque made for them. I went regularly to tend the little patch until we moved to another part of the country, then we visited their memorial every Birthday and Christmas. I felt totally responsible for my children dying. I met with local SANDS and have to say that the support was fantastic. I had some bereavement counselling which helped me to stop blaming myself.. I found out who my true friends were. It's amazing how people ignore you because they don't know what to say, and the things some people make up. One girl I worked with told the whole unit that I was sitting at home staring at the wall with food dripping down my chin because I thought I still had a baby inside me. What a horrible thing to say. She made me out to be mad..well i was a bit...mad at her for saying such things!!!!
It didn't look as if we would have any more children...a number of fertility tests and drugs made no difference...but finally.....a week before I was due to start IVF..I found out I was pregnant. I was filled with a mixture of emotions..happy..but also totally paranoid that something bad was going to happen to this baby. I was very sick again..but after the full nine months I gave birth to another daughter, Holly. Holly is now 12 and has grown up knowing that she has two sisters in heaven.I never fell pregnant again and last year I had a hysterectomy...so that is it....but I did have 3 children..some people never have any..so i am very lucky......and although Lucy and Georgina are not here in person..they will always be in my heart.
They would be 15 this year and although I have learned to live with the loss..I will never get over it. many is the time I sit on my own and weep at the loss of them. I have a few pictures..but of poor quality. I made them little white dresses with pink rosebuds on to be cremated in...so i still have the little pink knitted jackets that they were dressed in at the hospital. It might be 15 yeasr..but I can still smell them on those jackets. I have a pink rose that my grandparents gave me when the twins were born...15 years on and it still blooms, a reminder of them...two little rose buds that never opened fully.
Every year on their birthday my family send us cards and it means so much to us that the girls are remembered. every Christmas I buy all our Christmas cards from SANDS...it's the least I can do to support their good work, when they helped me so much. Also it's my way of reminding EVERYONE of my babies.
I found out about this site through the mother of a little boy that very sadly died last year and I felt compelled to make this for Georgina and Lucy.
Now I wouldn't say I was particularly supersticious..but..they were born on Friday 13th May 1994...add up 9+4 = 13. They weighed 13 ounces each. Georgina was born at 12.37 1+2+3+7 =13. Lucy was born at 1.03 10+3 =13. Now this bit is really gonna seem weird. They were born in room 13.....on the 13th floor!!!! How strange is that. Needless to say the number I always pick is 13!
God bless you my little ones and keep you safe till I can hold you once againx x x x x
The world may never notice
If a Snowdrop doesn't bloom,
Or even pause to wonder
If the petals fall too soon.
But every life that ever forms,
Or ever comes to be,
Touches the world in some small way
For all eternity.
The little ones we longed for
Were swiftly here and gone.
But the love that was then planted
Is a light that still shines on.
And though our arms are empty,
Our hearts know what to do.
Every beating of our hearts
Says that we love you.
On your 17th birthday, my beautiful daughters. Grandma is with you now. God Bless you all x x x
Mummy x x
Do not stand by my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow;
I am a diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain;
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awake in the morning hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft star shine at night.
Do not stand by my grave and cry.
I am not there...I DID NOT DIE.
How can you have really died when you are in my heart
xxxx Mummy xxxx
Happy Sweet 16 in Heaven Georgina and Lucy
We thought of you with love today.
But that is nothing new.
We thought about you yesterday.
And days before that too.
We think of you in silence.
We often speak your names.
Now all we have is memories.
And your pictures in their frames.
Your memory is our keepsake.
With which we'll never part.
God has you in his keeping.
We have you in our heart..
It's 16 years since you were born, you stayed with us for such a short time on earth, but you will always be in our hearts. The passing years do not diminish our love for you both, dear Georgina and Lucy.
Love forever Mummy, Daddy and your little sister Holly
x x x
Happy Birthday In Heaven - by Winnie Lovett
"Happy Birthday Angels"
It's sure to be the best one yet,
Though you left us here behind.
Did you think that we'd forget?
Your cake this year, will surely be,
A beauty to behold.
With the icing made of Silver,
And the candles made of Gold.
Yes, your birthday in Heaven,
Will be such a grand affair.
And I know you'll look so lovely,
With a halo in your hair.
The Angels will come from everywhere,
To sing your birthday song.
And I know they'll be so happy,
That you've joined, God's Happy Throng.
No I can't send a card this year,
Or give a gift so fine.
So I'll just send a special prayer,
To that wonderful Twins of yours.
Copyright of Winnie Lovett
Precious Child by Karen Taylor Good
In my dreams, you are alive and well
Precious child, precious child
In my mind, I see you clear as a bell
Precious child, precious child
In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart, there is hope
'Cause you are with me still
In my heart, you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
In my plans, I was the first to leave
Precious child, precious child
But in this world, I was left here to grieve
Precious child, my precious child
In my soul, there is a hole
That can never be filled
But in my heart there is hope
And you are with me still
In my heart you live on
Always there, never gone
Precious child, you left too soon,
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
God knows I want to hold you,
See you, touch you
And maybe there's a heaven
And someday I will again
Please know you are not forgotten until then
In my heart you live on
Always there never gone
Precious child, you left too soon
Tho' it may be true that we're apart
You will live forever... in my heart
____♥♥♥_____♥♥_____
__♥_____♥_♥___ __♥___
__♥______♥______ ♥___
___♥____JUST___♥ ____
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_________♥________ __
____♥♥♥_____♥ ♥♥
__♥_____♥_♥___ __♥___
__♥______♥______ ♥___
___♥___SHOWIN__♥ ____
_____♥_______♥__ ____
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_________♥________ __
____♥♥♥_____♥ ♥♥
__♥_____♥_♥___ __♥___
__♥______♥______ ♥___
___♥____SUM____♥ ____
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_________♥________ __
____♥♥♥_____♥ ♥♥
__♥_____♥_♥___ __♥___
__♥______♥______ ♥___
___♥____LOVE___♥ ____
_____♥_______♥__ ____
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_________♥________ __
____♥♥♥_____♥ ♥♥
__♥_____♥_♥___ __♥___
__♥______♥______ ♥___
___♥__ FOR __ ♥____
_____♥_______♥__ ____
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_________♥________ _
____♥♥♥_____♥ ♥♥
__♥_____♥_♥___ __♥___
__♥______♥______ ♥___
___♥__ ~ YOU~__ ♥____
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♥
.---------------------17TH FEBRUARY 2010.----------------------------
SENT WITH LOVE.................
________{☆}_*_{★}_________
_____{☆}_*_{★}_*_{☆}_____
___:_*_{☆}_*_{★}_*_{☆}.___
___*{☆}._;_{★}*_;_{★}_*;
_________|_/__/_/;_________
_________Y/_/_/___________
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________/_Y//_)________
_______(_,-}={-,_)___
_________//((_____
_____________ FROM JUDE. X X _________________
♥
Thinking of you xx
To lose your child is the hardest loss to bare
No other loss on earth will compare,
Your hearts been broken, your soul ripped in two
This precious child is a part of you.
You don’t know if you can carry on
Others try to tell you to be strong,
You struggle with each passing day
The pain in your heart will never go away.
Days and months come and go
The grief you feel begins to grow,
The ache and longing is always there
You sit alone, you sit and stare.
Nobody knows what to say to you
But you need their help to see you through,
Friends seem to start to drift away
They can’t listen to what you'd like to say.
You remind them of what life could be
If it happened to them instead of you or me,
Nobody understands your pain each day
Some look at you and just have to walk away.
They can’t bare to see you cry
You can’t stop or live a lie,
This is your life now and it’s for real
Your broken heart will never heal.
So if you know a mum who has lost her child
Please try to understand,
She does not need your sympathy
She needs you to hold her hand.
Some special days will come along
These are the days she can’t be strong,
Birthdays, Christmas and Mothers day
Are the days she dreads in every way?
Then came the day that hurt her the most
The day her life ended it changed for ever,
Please let her know the presence of her child
Will stay with her forever and leave her never.
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_***__________**____ ______***__
_***________________ ______***__
_***_________*IM*___ ______***__
__***_____*THINKING* _____***___
___***_______*OF*___ ____***____
____***_____*YOU *____ _***_____
______***____? ? ? ____**______
________***_________ ***________
__________***_____** *__________
___________***___*** ___________
____________***_***_ ___________
______________***___ ___________
_______________*____ ___________
was reading your bit above and that is terrible that they didn't try to help the baby that was alive. A friend of our family had a baby girl the day my brother died when she was only 4 months along and the baby was transparent and all when born but she survived. They could have done something poor little angels may they rest in peace
A Birthday In Heaven - Author Unknown
We heard you crying yesterday,
And felt your heart-sent love.
So we're sending you this message
Now, from Heaven up above.
You’re wondering if we'll celebrate
Our birthday (way up here).
We know you’re missing us today
We feel your essence near.
God planned a special day for us,
He told us with a wink.
He’d ordered us a special cake
(It’s Angel food, I think).
Balloons will fill the streets for us,
They float up through the clouds.
And we have lots of friends up here
That make us laugh out loud.
There is a birthday carousel,
Jewelled horses ride the wind,
With music playing, oh so sweet…
The magic never ends.
We’ve made so many friends, you see
We laugh and play and sing.
We ride our bikes and play the fool
And sleep in Angel’s wings.
But we don’t blow out our candles here
Instead, they light the skies.
Using the options below you can add this memorial to your personal garden.
| I am Lucy Elizabeth And G... ... | |
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There have been 123 candles lit for Lucy Elizabeth And Georgina May.
